INVADER MAZ: Tallest, please let me go to some puny planet that an Irken
invader has failed to, well, invade.
(PURPLE TALLEST is gazing unblinkily at MAZ, staring at her beauty)
RED TALLEST: Ummmmm.......ummmmmmmm...sure......uhhhh 
but which one?
MAZ: (flutters eyes) Oh....I dunno, how about Earth? (flutters eyes again)
R.T.: Umm.....ya....ok.....
MAZ: Oh thank you, my (sexy voice) almighty and all knowledgeable leaders.
(she kisses each of them and both of them sigh in pleasure) bye bye.
(After she leaves)
R.T. : Noooooooooooo!
P.T. What's wrong?!?!?!
R.T. We sent her to ZIM!!!
Both of them: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Back at Earth)
(Doorbell rings)
ZIM: GIR!! Get the door.
GIR: Sir, yes, sir! You know what's a weird word? FORK!!
(At the Door)
JOHNNY: Ummm, hi. I'm Nny, your next door neighbor. I'm selling Sporks 
and
salad tongs. You shall buy them.
GIR: Umm NO
NNY: You shall. You do not know the hideous things I have done with salad
tongs. Oh the pain.
GIR: Nice talkin' to ya! BYE BYE
NNY: um ya Bye.

(GIR goes back down to ZIM.)

ZIM: Who was it?
GIR:  NNNNNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
ZIM: o..............k
COMPUTER: Zim, I have signals indicating an invader is approaching Earth.
(ZIM is playing with a rubex cube)
ZIM: Curse Earth games! Oh, what? Okay, whatever.
 
 
 
 
 

(Next day at SKOOL)

MS. BITTERS: Class, we have a new student in our class..............her name is 
Maz.
(at that moment MAZ walks in. The children are all bored. When the boys look
at MAZ they stare longingly at her beautiful self.; MAZ flips her hair
beautifully)
MAZ: Ms. Bitters? May I sit at the front of the row so all the boys will 
look
like they are actually paying attention to you?
(MS. BITTERS is playing with a rubex cube)
M.B.: Oh, sure go ahead.
MAZ: I want her spot!
M.B.: Bye Sara
SARA: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
(MAZ sits by ZIM, and she stares lovingly at ZIM. Of course, he is oblivious
to her.)
(At recess, all the boys are surrounding MAZ just to look at her. She wants
to go to ZIM but he is "off in his own little world;" however, he notices
that all the boys are around her and he is not.)
ZIM: I ZIMMM! Am not an outcast! I shall show this love pig my " affection!"
(ZIM approaches her but they are dismissed, and DIB is talking to, and 
trying
to impress, MAZ after school.)
DIB: Aaaaaand I'm a paranormal investigator. I research questions like aliens 
and
why you are so beautiful.
MAZ: Wait, have you even found any "ALIENS" yet?
DIB: Ummmm... Actually, I have. His name is Zim. You know the green kid in 
our
class.
MAZ: Where does he live?
DIB: Why do you want to know?
MAZ: Well, ( she flips her hair) I wanted to know so we could maybe expose
him for the alien he really is.
DIB: Duhhh... Ok.
( As they approach ZIM's house)
MAZ: Thank you Dib. You can go home now.
DIB: Okey dokie.
MAZ: (sighs) ok here we go.( she rings the doorbell)
ZIM: Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyes?
MAZ: Hello Zim.
ZIM: Oh, hello love pig. You may idol me.
(MAZ pushes ZIM inside, locks the door, and rips off his disguise.)
ZIM: (in horror) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What are you doing?
(MAZ, slowly and romantically, takes off her disguise. She is exceedingly
beautiful, and very tall for a girl Irken invader)
ZIM: uhhhh..........
MAZ: Yes Zim, it is I, Maz.
ZIM: hummana hummmmmana humm.
MAZ: As you know, one Irken couple can join together and well, (she moves
closer to ZIM) it's my turn and I pick you.
(ZIM stares in disbelief as she holds his hands and gazes into his red 
eyes.)

ZIM: Why do you choose me? I mean, you had all those tall and strong and
handsome and tall Irken boys to choose from? FOR CRYING OUT LOUD YOU 
COULD'VE
PICKED THE TALLEST! YOU WOULD'VE BEEN IN COMMAND! And why me?
MAZ: Well, I knew them before they were high and mighty, and they were in
love with me like all the other boys. They only wanted to grow taller so 
that
they could try and impress me. They wanted me to pick them. They both wanted
me to pick both of them. That would've been weird. Because as you know, 
the
couple get to have one Irken child that isn't genetically created in labs
like you and me. I really like you, no I love you Zim! (she throws herself
into his arms) Hold me.
ZIM: I...I...don't know what to say........
GIR: I LOOOOVE YOU! (GIR runs up and gives MAZ a hug)
ZIM: You didn't tell me why you picked me.
MAZ: Well, your naivety, to me, is a turn on, and we are total opposites.
Opposites attract, you know. But really, I don't know.. I just love you 
Zim,
I love you with all my heart.
ZIM: But what about my mission?
MAZ: Why do you think I came to Earth, and not have you be ordered to come 
to
Irk? I want to work on the mission with you because (she flips her hair) I
want to be with you. (her eyes flutter)  I love you.
ZIM: But what if we do get "married"
MAZ: Then we use this ( she pulls out a weird device thingy) to speed up 
time
so we are older and "old enough", in human eyes, to get "married."
ZIM: Wow! You have had a lot of time to plan this haven't you?
(MAZ nods) MAZ: I love you Zim.
ZIM: I love you too...
GIR: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!
(They become silhouetted and they kiss)
GIR: Awwwwwwwwww.
(MAZ presses the button, and swirly effects happen; MAZ is now even taller
and more beautiful (if that was Irkenly possible) and ZIM stayed the same
except he is taller and a little cuter)
MAZ: I love you Zim!
ZIM: I love you too TAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dun Dunnn DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.....................

Will MAZ dump ZIM? Will ZIM apologize? Will they get "married"? Will anyone
actually read this?
SCROLL down to find out what happens..
 
 
 
 
 

MAZ: What do you mean TAC!!!!!!!
ZIM: Ooopsie!
GIR: He's still in love with her.
ZIM: But I love you too!
(MAZ is crying a cry so cryiful that no one can resist the cry) MAZ: YOU
IDIOT!! I gave anything and everything any Irken boy could ever want! ME AND
MY HEART! And you call me TAC!! She wanted to destroy you! I want to love
you! AND YOU SAY HER NAME! YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A THING WITH HER!!!!!!! 
DIB DID!!!!!!!!!
I'm going  next door to Nny so he can take care of our little TAC problem. 
In
the mean time Zim, you need to find a way to make it up to me.
(Maz leaves)
ZIM: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gir! How will I ever make it up to
her!! She changed me. I love her for that.
GIR: I don't know master, how about you get her some Irken sweets and
flowers?
ZIM: Gir, that is the most BRILLIANT thing you have ever come up with.
(ZIM orders packages and they come in a meteor 5 seconds later)
ZIM: About time!
(MAZ walks through the front door with an evil grin on her face)
MAZ: Instead of having Johnny give Tac to Dib, I made him KILL her to her
doom for having ever seducing you into her sluttish schemes of doom.
(ZIM gives MAZ the sweets and flowers. The flowers are chocolate and the
sweets are made from Poison Oak leaves; MAZ graciously excepts them)
MAZ: Oh Zim! I forgive you for falling into that little tramp's clutches! 
No one could resist. I love you.
(ZIM and MAZ kiss)
GIR: Yeah!!!!!!!! More kissing!!
78 4/9 hours later
GIR: YEAH! They are STILL kissing!
ZIM: Maz?
MAZ: Yes Zim?
ZIM: That was the most kissing I have ever done!
MAZ Heehee. Me, too, and here comes another one!
ZIM: he he Will hmhmhmhmmm  (ZIM's words are muffled as he passionately
kisses MAZ)
MAZ: What did you say dear?
ZIM: I said, (ZIM goes down on one knee) Will you do me the greatest honor
and marry me?-I know, it's corny,just keep reading
MAZ: Of course!
(MORRRRRRRRRRRE KISSING!!!!)
MAZ: Zim? I still can't believe you called me Tak.
ZIM: Awwww.... Somebody needs a Kiss!
MAZ: Yes I do! 
ZIM: That was our 56,935,748,302 kiss!
MAZ: (Gasp) That means we are married!
ZIM: Ya. You know what that means...
MAZ: We can have a child now (MAZ lifts her leg up and puts it on ZIM's
thigh; ZIM, in response, carries her away in his arms to the deep, dark,
deepy place that is ZIM's laboratory; MAZ is still a little taller than 
ZIM,
but he got taller when they got married)-why did I put that in?
(GIR at the door)
GIR: Yessssssss?
DIB: HELLO (DIB is older now. He's like in his 20's but instead of happy
noodle boy he has Maz's face on his shirt)
GIR: I'm going to go into explody mode.
DIB: Where is Zim?
GIR: He's making babies. I like babies.
DIB: Ewwwww. Really? Who with?
GIR: MAZ!!!!
DIB: NO! (he is propelled by his own sense of grief)
GIR: YES! HEHAHAHAHAHEEHAW!
DIB: My beloved Maz! Wait, how are they doing it?
GIR: It's kinda like the birds and the bees, but with Irks; you know how 
they...

DIB: Really? Can I watch.
GIR: Noooooooooooooooo.
DIB: I'm going in.
GIR: NOoooooOOOo! EXPLODY
MODE!!!!!!!!!!!!
DIB: NO!!!!! Wait, what is "explody mod.....
(BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! He explody then he grew back together, and DIB is sad! 
Boo hoo. He broke his butt in 3 places. Yay!)
 

(down in the Lab, they feel the boom)
MAZ: Zim! Was that you?
ZIM: umm no.Maz?
MAZ: Yes, Zim?
ZIM: What happens if the Dib creature finds out about us?
MAZ: I don't know....
(GIR storms in the room)
GIR: I exploded and hurt Dib!
MAZ: He was here!?!
GIR: uh huh.
ZIM: Why?
MAZ: I made Dib think that I was in love with him so he could show me where
you lived. Then I dismissed him. I think he is still in love with me. Gir,
what did you tell Dib?
GIR: I said you two were making babies!! YAY!
MAZ and ZIM: uh oh!
ZIM: Oh well....
MAZ: Kiss me!!!!!!!
ZIM: Okey Dokie!! Ahhhhh. Hee hee heee
NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY RANDOM
(At planet Irk)
R.T.:I crave MAZ!!!
P.T.: Then why did you let her go!?
R.T.: I dunno. You just can't say no to her. Hey it's time to measure
ourselves.
P.T.: NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
R.T.: What?!
P.T.: We are shrinking without Maz!!!!!!!!!!
Both of them: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
(back on Earth)
MAZ: Zim, I think we should take a break.
ZIM: Yeah. I am tired.
MAZ: May I add a room?
ZIM: huh? Ya, ok.
MAZ: (kisses him) Thank you, love muffin.
ZIM: Good night.
(MAZ quickly builds a secret love room)
3 days later!
ZIM: uhhhh! I am refreshed for more of my beloved Maz. Maz, where are you?
(he notices the extra room and he goes in. MAZ is lying on a romantic bed.
She has that sexy look in her eyes that she gets.)
MAZ: (in a sexy voice) Hello Zim...
ZIM: Uhhhhh…. Maz? What are you doing? He he (nervous laugh)
MAZ: Waiting for you, you silly goose!
ZIM: oh um ok...
COMPUTER: Zim! Incoming message from the tallest!
ZIM: (good) Oh ok Computer.
RED TALLEST: ZIM!!!!!!! WE NEED MAZ!OUR ENTIRE ECO- SYSTEM REVOLVES AROUND
HER!
ZIM and MAZ: Really?!
PURPLE TALLEST: No, we just like you a lot and we like looking at you.
MAZ: Oh. Well I'm sorry. I love Zim and he loves me so I'm staying right
here.
RED TALLEST: Well, there is a rule that says you can not be married and
invade a planet at the same time.
PURPLE TALLEST: Really? I have never....OW! My Sqeedly Spooch!
MAZ: Really?
RT: Really really.
MAZ: Then we will conduct this invasion on our own and we will seclude
ourselves from the rest of Irken society.
PT: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo! I need you Maz! I neeeeeeeed you!
MAZ: Oops! I can't hear you bad connection. Bye bye.
ZIM: I loooove you Maz.
MAZ: Zim, I feel sick.
GIR: Awwwwwwwwww.YAY! She's gonna be sick!
MAZ: I think I'm going to fai....(MAZ faints but luckily ZIM catches her)
ZIM: Come on Gir, we have to make Maz lie down. (They set her down) I still
can't believe the best Irken girl picked me, of all invaders, to be her
husband.
NEXT DAY
MAZ: Zim, I have something to tell you.
ZIM: Sure, baby, anything.
MAZ: It's funny you should mention baby.
ZIM: Why?
MAZ: Because we are going to have one.
(This time, ZIM faints, and MAZ couldn't catch him)
MAZ: Ummm, Gir, take Zim to our bed and lie him down on it.
GIR: Ma'am yes ma'am.

(A Month Later)
MAZ: Zim, as you know our baby is about to be born.
ZIM: Yeah... so?
MAZ: Didn't they teach you anything? I  need bodily tissue. TISSUE!!!! You
know like the body tissue of the dominant species on the planet we invade.
ZIM: Oh goodie. I know just the victim.....
(At DIB's house) AN-Muahahahahahaha...ha....he........he
ZIM: Hello Dib.
DIB: Zim! What do you want?
ZIM: I want your butt.
DIB: My butt! Why do you want my butt?
ZIM: Do not question me. I need your butt.
DIB: Never!! Why?
ZIM: So Maz can put our baby in it so it will eat it.
DIB: Ewww.
ZIM: No time for games. Give me your butt.
DIB: NEVER!!
(ZIM bites DIB's butt and takes it off. It’s a bloody mess yay!)
ZIM: (muffled) Dye Dib! And fanks for the dutt!
(DIB is lying on the sidewalk twitching convulsively and bleeding)
A COUPLE YEARS LATER
(ZIM and MAZ apparently had a daughter. POOPZI is hyperactive-even more than
GIR- and very temperamental. MAZ and ZIM looks tired and depressed)
MAZ: (toneless) Goodbye Zim. (gives him a kiss) I have to conquer South
America now.
ZIM: Bye sweetie. Hurry back! Poopzi, go to Skool.
POOPZI: I DON'T WANNA!!!!!!!
ZIM: Do as your told.
POOPZI: Fine.
( GIR stubbles into the room. He holds in head in his arms.)
GIR: Master? Will you put my head back on?
ZIM: Yes. Gir. For once you are acting like a normal SIR.
GIR: Poopzi takes it out of you.
ZIM: Yeah. Sometimes I wish that I could get rid of her.
COMPUTER: Zim. Incoming message from the Tallest.
ZIM: Good. Put them on the screen.
R.T.: ZIM. We have a proposal to offer you.
P.T.: WE NEED MAZ!!!!!!!!!
R.T.: Smooth. We really do. In fact we..
P.T.: WE'RE SHRINKING!!!!!!!!!!!!WE NEED HER!
ZIM: Will you take Poopzi, too?
R.T.: Who?
P.T.: Her daughter.
R.T.: Oh. Is she like Maz?
ZIM: ummm yes in fact she is.
R.T.: Great! Send them over to Irk rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrright now.
ZIM: Oh, no. What am I going to do Gir?
GIR: I don't know.
ZIM: (Pacing) I love Maz with all my heart, but I LOATHE our daughter. I
LOATHE HER SO MUCH!
GIR: Want me to go get Maz and Poopzi?
ZIM: Yes, Gir. That, actually, would be some help.
( 5 minutes later)
GIR: Here they are.
POOPZI: DAD! Why do you want me here?
MAZ: Yes, Zim. I am also quite curious to why you needed us.
ZIM: Maz, you are going to take Poopzi on a little trip to planet Irk.
MAZ: I am?
ZIM: Yes, you are.
MAZ: Oh. Ok. Poopzi, get the voot cruiser ready.
POOPZI: Fine, mother.
MAZ: Zim, why aren't you coming too?
ZIM: (sighs) The tallest need you to go back to Irk.
MAZ: So? They have been wanting me to go back there ever since I got here.
ZIM: Yes, well, they said they would take and keep Poopzi if she came along.
MAZ: So what you are saying is that I have to go back to Irk, and be their
queen with Poopzi?
ZIM: Sadly, yes.
MAZ: And I'll never see you again?
ZIM: (sighs) No.
MAZ: AND I'LL HAVE TO BE WITH POOPZI?
ZIM: Yes.
MAZ: NOOOOOOoooo!
MAZ: (kisses ZIM on the cheek) Bye love. Be back in a little while.
( After MAZ and POOPZI leave, ZIM starts to cry)
ZIM: Gir, I'll never see her again.
GIR: It'll ok master. Look on the bright side, you'll never see Poopzi
again.
COMPUTER: Incoming message from the Tallests.
R.T.: Zim, we don't need Maz and/or Poopzi anymore.
P.T.: Ya. We got dates with Silver and Pink from our twin planet Irka.
SILVER: Come on Red, we need to go. AN-hee hee! That's me!
PINK: Ya, Purple, we need to go too. AN-That's my BF. Hey I was bored!
RED: Well, see ya Zim. I'm coming  babe!
PURPLE: Ya see ya Zim. Oh and by the way, we are tall again. Hee hee. (RED
and PURPLE give ZIM thumbs up with smiles )
ZIM: Ok, well that takes care of that problem, but what about Poopzi?
GIR: Have Nny take care of her.
ZIM: Good idea.
(A few days later with their ruling hats on and everyone bowing)
MAZ: I love you Zim.
ZIM: I love you too Maz.
(At planet Irka)
SILVER TALLEST: Why did we just have a stupid cameo in this episode?
PINK TALLEST: I don't know. Maybe it is showing a brief part of our date 
with
the Tallests.
SILVER: Well, they have to read Date Between the Planets for that.
PINK: Hee hee you're right. I love being evil.